i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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