Need sex. Gaining weight.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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