You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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