I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Randomize
