Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Randomize
