I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize