just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
