Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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