Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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