Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
you win again, gameday.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
