My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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