I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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