I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize