Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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