I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I wish i was in the wii world.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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