I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
she peed on how many people?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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