no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm so fucking centered right now
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
