Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
nutella sex= disaster
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
