Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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