she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize