What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
