I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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