so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
