ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I want you more than these girls want KFC
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
