in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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