So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
