Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
