He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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