what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
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