Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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