LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Are we still banned from the library?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
try to milk me bitch
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