she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Randomize