so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
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i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
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The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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