I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
