she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
