i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
