You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
