hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
