Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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