i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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