Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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