put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
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