Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Green mimosas i think yes
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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