Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
COCAINE IS GR8
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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