So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
false alarm, still single
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
