They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
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