dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
