We're like a lot better than the average bears
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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