shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize