i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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