What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize