I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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